You don’t need to be Lionel Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo to have an appreciation for the attractive recreation of soccer. Soccer is the world’s hottest sport, and it’s performed in additional than 200 international locations. Whether or not you’ve simply misplaced a tricky match and wish one thing to lighten the temper or simply take pleasure in watching the game, you’ll get a kick out of those soccer jokes, puns, and one-liners. Learn, bookmark, and share them together with your gamers or fellow followers!
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Plus, click on the button under to obtain a Google Slideshow with all of our soccer jokes in an easy-to-present format!
Humorous Soccer Jokes
1. What’s a ghost’s favourite soccer place?
Ghoul keeper.
2. What did the unhealthy soccer announcer get for Christmas?

COOOOAAAALLLL!!!!!
3. Why can’t Cinderella play soccer?

As a result of she all the time runs away from the ball.
4. Why don’t grasshoppers watch soccer?

They watch cricket as a substitute.
5. What sort of tea do soccer gamers drink?

Penal-tea.
6. My boyfriend made a save in a soccer recreation.

That’s how I knew he was a keeper.
7. Which soccer participant has the most important cleats?

The one with the most important toes.
8. What place do ghosts play in soccer?

Ghoulie.
9. What’s it referred to as when a dinosaur scores a objective?

A dino-score.
10. The place do soccer gamers go to bop?

The Futball.
11. What lights up a soccer stadium?

A soccer match.
12. Why couldn’t anybody see the soccer ball?

The protection cleared it.
13. What time is it when a soccer workforce chases a baseball workforce?

Eleven after 9 (9:11).
14. Why shouldn’t you play soccer within the jungle?

There are too many cheetahs!
15. Why did the soccer ball stop the workforce?

It was uninterested in being kicked round.
16. Why do soccer gamers provide you with the perfect soccer jokes?

They know the best way to use their heads.
17. What sort of soccer workforce cries when it loses?

A bawl membership.
18. How do birds cheer for his or her soccer groups?

They egg them on.
19. Why did the rooster get ejected from the soccer recreation?

Persistent fowl play.
20. Why didn’t the canine wish to play soccer?

He was a boxer.
21. How do soccer gamers keep cool throughout video games?

They play close to the followers.
22. Why did the soccer participant deliver string to her recreation?

So she might tie the rating.
23. What time is it when an elephant steps in your soccer ball?

Time to get a brand new ball.
24. Knock Knock.

Who’s there?
Soccer.
Soccer who?
Socc-ser within the drawer.
25. What do soccer referees ship in the course of the holidays?

Yellow playing cards.
26. What are profitable forwards all the time making an attempt to do?

Attain targets.
27. Which soccer participant retains the sphere neat?

The sweeper.
28. Why did the defensive soccer participant cross the street?

To get to the opposite slide.
29. Why couldn’t the all-star soccer participant take heed to music?

As a result of he broke all of the information.
30. What do you name somebody who walks forwards and backwards screaming one minute, then sits down weeping uncontrollably the subsequent?

A soccer coach.
31. The place do forwards go to bop?

Soccer balls.
32. Why didn’t the awful soccer workforce have an internet site?

They couldn’t string three W’s collectively.
33. A soccer riddle: Two soccer groups play a recreation in opposition to one another. The house workforce wins, however not a single man from both workforce scored a objective. How can this be?

They have been girls’s soccer groups!
34. Why can’t you play soccer with pigs?

They hog the ball.
35. How does a tea bag play soccer?

It steep-kicks the ball.
36. Why did the soccer workforce go to the Bermuda Triangle?

To seek out their lacking soccer ball.
37. Why was the soccer participant’s uniform all the time wrinkled?

As a result of they couldn’t discover an iron within the soccer stadium.
38. Why was the sunshine bulb good at soccer?

It’s all the time the brightest participant on the sphere!
39. Why was the unhealthy soccer announcer fired?

He couldn’t discover the again of the web together with his phrases.
40. What do a bunch of soccer followers and a bunch of individuals chasing butterflies have in widespread?

Each are a swarm.
41. What sort of soccer workforce cries after each match?

The “tear-mendous” gamers.
42. What a part of a soccer pitch smells the worst?

The tip zone, after a soccer match!
43. Why are scrambled eggs like a dropping soccer workforce?

As a result of they’ve each been crushed.
44. What runs round a soccer subject however by no means strikes?

A fence.
45. What do you name it when soccer gamers don’t put on their cleats?

Socker.
46. What do you name it when electrical eels play soccer?

Shocker.
47. What do you name a really tiring soccer match?

Slog-cer.
48. What do you name it when soccer followers cry like a child if their workforce loses?

Soccer bawl.
49. Why don’t soccer followers put on eyeglasses?

It’s a contact sport.
50. What’s the identify of the soccer workforce that performs in tall grass?

Weeds United.
51. What’s the identify of the soccer workforce made up of jokers?

Manjester United.
52. What’s the identify of the soccer workforce made up of confused and misguided gamers?

Liverfool.
53. What soccer workforce is made up of sunshine bulbs?

Wattford.
54. What’s the identify of the soccer workforce the place witchcraft is a no-no?

Notwitch Metropolis.
55. What’s the identify of the sunburned soccer workforce?

Burntley FC.
56. What’s the identify of the brightest soccer workforce?

Lightcester Metropolis.
57. What’s the identify of the crookedest soccer workforce?

Bentford.
58. What do you name a soccer workforce with solely wingers?

Birdmingham Metropolis.
59. Which soccer workforce is made up of solely nuns?

Conventry Metropolis.
60. Which soccer workforce is made up of midfielders solely?

Middlelessborough.
61. Which soccer workforce is made up of sheep?

Baaaa-celona.
62. Which soccer workforce is simply studying to learn?

ABCDE FC.
63. What do you name a referee in a doggie soccer match?

A rufferee.
64. What do you name a Greek thinker who performed soccer?

Soccerates.
65. Who is without doubt one of the richest soccer gamers on the planet?

Cristiano Rollindough.
66. What do you name a pig who doesn’t move the ball?

A ball hogger.
67. What’s a goalkeeper’s favourite snack?

Beans on the submit.
68. How do Italian soccer gamers ask their teammates to move the ball?

Pasta bowl.
69. What does a soccer participant say on Halloween?

Hat trick or deal with!
70. What do you name a ship that holds 20 soccer groups, and three groups go away it every season?

Premier-ship.
71. How does the highest of the soccer objective submit really feel each time a ball hits it?

Crossbar.
72. What do you name a Greek legendary creature taking part in soccer?

Centaur ahead.
73. What did Santa deliver the naughty soccer participant?

COAAAAAAAAAL!!!!
74. Which goalie can leap increased than the crossbar?

All of them. Crossbars don’t leap.
75. Why are soccer gamers wonderful at math?

They actually know the best way to use their heads.
76. Why did the soccer ball go to highschool?

To get a kick-start in life.
77. What’s a soccer participant’s favourite animal?

A score-pion.
78. What do you name a soccer participant who doesn’t rating targets?

A keeper.
79. What did the soccer participant get on the bakery?

A roll.
80. What did the magician present the soccer gamers?

A hat trick.
81. Why did the soccer participant carry a pencil?

To attract a foul.
82. What was the workforce of cow soccer gamers referred to as?

Moo-nited.
83. Why couldn’t the soccer gamers play playing cards?

They stored getting crimson playing cards (ejected from the sport).
84. Why did the soccer participant fail artwork class?

They couldn’t draw a foul.
85. Why did the participant take pleasure in soccer jokes a lot?

They have been a soccer for a very good pun.
86. What was the lazy kangaroo soccer participant referred to as?

A pouch potato.
87. What’s the perfect place to play in case you don’t like soccer?

Proper again—proper again within the locker room.
88. How do you cease squirrels from taking part in soccer?

Conceal the ball—it drives them nuts!
89. What’s one of the best ways to get a soccer coach to smile?

Win the sport.
90. What’s the distinction between a tea bag and a foul soccer workforce?

The tea bag stays within the cup longer!
91. What do you name a day with out soccer?

I like soccer an excessive amount of to know!
Soccer Puns and One-Liners
92. When the pitch will get flooded, soccer groups deliver on the subs.

93. My mother instructed me to by no means date a soccer participant as a result of there’s solely a 1-in-11 likelihood they’re a keeper.

94. Soccer is the one sport that’s not a recreation of inches. It’s a recreation of toes.

95. Soccer gamers are all the time the primary to get the ball rolling in any activity.

96. Soccer pitches get moist in a short time as a result of gamers are all the time dribbling.

97. Salmon are recognized for his or her dream of being pro-fish-sional soccer gamers.

98. I inform soccer jokes only for kicks.

99. Swimmers are terrible at soccer as a result of they hold diving.

100. The very best place to purchase a brand new soccer shirt is New Jersey.

101. That soccer participant is so vibrant, his mom calls him “sunshine” when he’s on the sphere.

102. Soccer defenders: really a goal-oriented bunch!

103. Cleat expectations: If you suppose you’ll win the sport by simply lacing up.

104. Offsides? Extra like “Aw, sides … I believed I used to be clear!”

105. I knew a soccer ball that was fairly inflated. It had such a giant ego.

106. The grass is all the time greener the place you’re not taking part in soccer.

107. The person who invented soccer acquired a kick out of it.

108. My son performed soccer within the mud all day, so he was somewhat Messi.

109. For those who have been a soccer ball, I’d by no means shoot, as a result of I’d all the time miss you.

110. They need to finish soccer video games with an artwork competitors. That approach it might be win, lose, or draw.

111. Seven days with out taking part in soccer could make one weak.

112. Soccer is an odd recreation—it’s a bunch of individuals working away from their targets.

113. I’m a soccer for you.

114. Left and proper midfielders eat wings after the sport.

115. Punt-il subsequent time.

116. I shot you need to know the reality.

117. It’s previous your soc-cerfew.

118. Cracking good soccer jokes is my objective.

119. If you pay with soccer balls, it’s referred to as soc-cerrency.

120. The soccer participant was free kick–ing out about taking a penalty shot.

121. Soccer gamers are tough as a result of they know the best way to set traps.

122. The very best canine breed for soccer is the goal-den retriever.

123. Referees are simply soccer gamers who’ve gone blind.

124. Heard somebody say they needed to play soccer with second graders. They need to actually put money into a ball.

125. I’m head over cleats in love with soccer!

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What are your favourite soccer jokes? Come share in our We Are Teachers HELPLINE group on Fb!
Plus, try Cheesy Teacher Jokes That Make Us Laugh Out Loud.

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